inquiring minds

YAS: hey, did your cousin get her boobs done?
ME: what???
YAS: her facebook pictures, they’re nothing but her humongous boobs. did she get them done?
ME: what makes you think i would know?
YAS: because, she tells you everything, including the real cause of her divorce.
ME: okay, one, she most certainly does NOT tell me everything. and two, she did say she’s now more voluptuous because of her recent weight gain.
YAS: oh please, no asian woman can achieve that kind of NATURAL voluptuousness even if she gained 200 lbs.
ME: maybe she’s found some enhancement bra more effective than the miracle bra.
YAS: if that were true, then half the plastic surgeons in beverly hills would be out of work.
ME: well, she’s really good with make-up, face AND body.
YAS: same argument applies.
ME: um, maybe she’s been getting lots of massages from her boyfriend.
YAS: heh. you really believed that technique would work 15 years ago, didn’t you? and i don’t see that it’s done you any good, despite my good efforts.
ME: i believed a lot of things you said. anyway, you and i haven’t dated in nearly 15 years, thus any rights you have to comment on my boobs have long since expired.
YAS: so did she get them done?
ME: if salaciousness were a crime, you’d be on death row.
YAS: along with rest of the male population. so did she get them done?
ME: that’s what the penal code ought to criminalize, salaciousness.
YAS: oooooooh, penal.
ME: honestly, haven’t you better things to do than ogle boobs, real or fake?
YAS: …
ME: well then?
YAS: so did she get them done?